A (not so) serious letter to @twitter

In Inside Venezuela, Uncategorized on abril 24, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Dear Mr. Larry (Bird):

Hope you’re doing well.

I’m writing you today as a concerned citizen of Venezuela.

If you can only read this paragraph, I’ll be more than satisfied. The rest, where I merely will try to explain my petition, is up to you. So let’s get to the point, this is my request in less than 140 characters: please, PLEASE, take good care of the password of the @chavezcandanga twitter account.

You see, that’s the official account of our current president, and he (being treated against cancer in Cuba, and absent from national territory for most of the year) make the very regretable decision (for him and for us) of not delegate the presidential powers on the vice-president and -most important for my current petition- decided to run the goverment, well, from twitter.

“How so?” you may ask, and, I know, it’s a very difficult thing to imagine. But I think the best way to explain this is looking at some tweets, don’t you think? so, here it goes:

Presidential tweet from april 17th

The tweet said: "Hi Venezuela. I inform you that I have approved 1.950 millions for states and counties from oil revenues. Let's go!"

That tweet announces $450.000.000 dollars approved to states all around the country (Yes, he handles public money as if it is not ours but his, but let’s not deviate from the issue). Not bad, that kind of t-goverment, huh? But, here’s the deal: from this account had also come out tweets like this one:

Presidential tweet

Don't waste your time...this means in spanish exactly the same thing as in english...

You must remember this tweet from some weeks ago, dear twitter guys, when it became an instant worldwide trend.

That tweet, of course, means the same in spanish as in english: “I really don’t know how to handle this carefully enough as to use it as a substitute of a constitutional state”.

Sure, it is possible that the mistake was the responsability of one of the 200 hundred employees that take care of this account (something that the president himself once said). It is also very likely that some kid (a grandchildren, maybe?) took grandpa’s Blackberry (yes, the anti-imperialist president carries around a very capitalist Blackberry) and simply touched some random keys. In any, case, the only thing I’m asking to you (twitter guys, are you still there?) is to take special care of that password for the following reason:

If the twitter account of our beloved leader (no no, that’s just a joke, it is not a crime NOT to call him like that… yet) for any cause, any given time, gets hacked, and tweets something like “we had just launch an aerial attack to the US, take that, you f*$%& gringos!” some of us will reeeally have a hard time when the “empire” strikes back.

But just some of us, and of course not him because… you know… our president lives in Cuba now.

And he’s receiving the treatment that not one poor cancer patient from our country can receive at our destroyed public hospitals.

But that’s for another tweet.

Thanks, yours sincerely:




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